well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
Randomize
