so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Randomize
