if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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