Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Randomize
