wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
