My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize
