Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
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