I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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