We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
