I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Randomize
