As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
