worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize
