The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Randomize
