I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
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