There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
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