Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Randomize
