careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
not ubering you a puppy
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
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