Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Sponge bath it is.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
