Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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