i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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