My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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