God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
