I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
Randomize
