if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
