She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
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