I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
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