Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Randomize
