Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize
