I just saw a hot homeless man
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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