i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
