Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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