I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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