return my video game
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
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