Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
