she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Randomize
