the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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