He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
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