So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Randomize
