Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
