erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
the gays at disneyland are vicious
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
Randomize
