I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
Randomize
