She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
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