so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Randomize
