Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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