I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Randomize
