doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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