it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Randomize
