I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
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