I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
