actually, I'm a sock model
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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